Tonight I went to happy hour with the ladies at work. I had 2 glasses of wine before heading back to my babies (don’t worry I came home at lunch to take them out). I stopped at Kroger on my way home and it amazed me how many dudes were checking me out. Sure, I looked cute today, but I often do and I never seem to get this much attention.
So there was this good looking guy in front of me in line and he kept turning around and looking at me, so I smiled, but very quickly looked away because I’m shy like that. I kept his eyes long enough for him to smile back, but that was all I could handle. And while this may seem small, this was a big deal for me. I’m not good at this kinda thing!
As we stood there in line he kept turning around and looking at me, but I pretended to be looking at movies or magazines or chickens or whatever…because I’m shy like that. And honestly I thought he was very attractive and I just didn’t know what to do. Say hello might have been the obvious choice. Make eye contact again. I dunno.
So he left and I left and as I was leaving the parking lot I asked myself WWWD – What Would Will Do? And then I realized it was obvious. He’d say something like “How are you?”. Something basic. Something I should, as a 33 year old woman, be able to say to a man without crapping my pants. Right? Yeah, not so much.
I was happy that I’d taken the step of at least smiling, albeit briefly before looking away, but I need to be more open, more confident, more at ease. I probably just need practice.
I’ve been told that I’m a big flirt, but it’s always in situations that I’m super comfortable, where I know people and feel confident….like when I was working at Starbucks…or even at work sometimes. But it only comes out when I don’t feel threatened and I guess now I have to wonder why I feel threatened in these other situations. I’m no longer that girl who is scared to walk across a room in front of people to get to the bathroom, but I’m still not the woman who can make eye contact with, or smile at, everyone I pass. I want to be her.
I want to be comfortable being me.
lmao@WWWD. hee la rious!
Will would have just played with his nipple while licking his lips. yup! thats me!
totally kidding.
maybe.
I loved this post. One thing a man loves is a nice smile from a beautiful woman. When a man sees the coy smile and then the look away, to us it means an invitation to say “Hello my name is…” Be careful of the man who is not confident enough to approach you after all of the inviting signals. You want a man who is self assured.
Good point! The guys I’ve ended up liking best were the ones who came after me (not in a weird way) instead of the ones I went to a lot of work for.
I’d prepare a good response for “My name is X and I’d like to get your number”-or whatever. You don’t want to stumble over your response ; ). You want to be just as cool and confident as they are!
See? This is why I love you guys. I never would have thought to prepare an answer, I’d just stumble and look like an idiot, but now I have a chance to think about it and prepare! I’ll get this one day – I will!
Some things might easily come to mind, but I found it was nice to have a plan to suggest – “Hey I’m Marvin, I’d love to take you out sometime.”
Me: “I’d really like that. How about a cup of coffee at xx coffee shop. I’m free this weekend if you want to pick a time to meet.”
That way it’s on your terms ; ). Plus, if a guy didn’t like coffee or didn’t like me enough to pretend to like it, he was out.
OMG No you DID NOT just use the name Marvin in your example! LMAO!! Marvin is the name of my co-worker who drives me fuckin batty – Old Uncle Marv….WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!?>!?
LOL
That is a good point. I didn’t think of it like that, so I’m happy to have that perspective! I just want to make sure I don’t cross the thin line between being coy and looking uninterested…that’s where I struggle.